Today I watched my dog run through the tall grass, jump onto high ledges, swim to the other side of the lake. So happy to be fully alive and in his element. I feel that it's important to get him out into nature often because it's his natural environment. Rowan ain't no lap dog, that's for sure. He's about half wild I think. He needs to experience his home environment as often as possible.

Everything is that way. Like fish, for example, they need air. Yet if you take them out of water they die. In the same way, birds need water but if you hold them down in it they will die too. Rowan's life only makes sense to the extent that he lives by his natural instincts. Otherwise, he will die.

It is the same for me. My life only makes sense in the context of the church. It's absurd really in any other context. I am dying. I know it. Sometimes I get a gasp of breath, maybe two. But, mainly I am dying.